One, Two
by Souten
Summary: Kagome wants to teach Shippou how to count to ten, using a certin poem. It's harder than it sounds... oneshot


A/N - Hiya, everybody!! This was just funny idea I had when I was reading Shel Silverstein's "One, Two" from "A Light in the Attic." The poem is at the bottom, in case you've never read it, or have forgotten it. And I just wrote this in about a half an hour (plus it's my first one-shot), so it isn't very good- not that any of my writings are. This is just worse than most. I'd still appreciate it if you read it, though, and maybe leave a review when you finish. Thanks!!  
  
~Souten  
  
Disclaimer - If I owned InuYasha, Kagome and InuYasha would be together already, and so would Miroku and Sango. Kikyou would be dead, and Sesshoumaru would be an official "good guy."  
  
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One, Two  
  
By Souten  
  
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It was a very pretty day in the Sengoku Jidai, when Kagome decided to teach Shippou how to count to ten while they stopped for lunch. The best way, she had decided, was to use a poem. They were fun, easy to remember, and a simple beat. And so, the three other adults watching curiously, Kagome began to teach Shippou his numbers.  
"One, two, buckle my shoe," she began. InuYasha snorted. "What?"  
"One, two, buckle my shoe? Shippou doesn't even HAVE shoes, lets alone one with buckles," he answered.  
"Just what are buckles, Kagome-chan?" asked Sango, curiously. "I've never heard of them."  
"I haven't either, actually." Miroku added.  
" Ah, well, it's this-" Kagome started trying to explain when InuYasha interrupted.  
"It's a strip of something with holes in it, and there's a stick that goes through the hole to keep it in place. It's not hard to buckle something, even Shippou could do it."  
"HEY!! What's that s'pos'ta mean, dog boy?!" Shippou asked angrily.  
"Exactly what it sounds like, runt!" retorted the hanyou.  
Kagome sighed.  
"Cut it out you two," she ordered, then tried again when they quieted. "One, two, buckle my shoe-"  
"I can buckle my own shoe!!" Shippou piped, still a bit sore about InuYasha's 'even Shippou could do it' comment. Kagome rubbed her head.  
"Fine, fine, how about one, two, buckle your shoe-"  
"Better."  
"Three, four, shut the door-"  
InuYasha's snort made the girl pause once more.  
"What now?" she asked, irritated.  
"Shut the damn door yourself," he answered. Kagome glared in response.  
"InuYasha, be polite to a lady!" Miroku admonished (his hand creeping steadily nearer to Sango).  
"Why, so I can grope her later?" came the sarcastic retort.  
"That only works for houshi-sama, InuYasha, and only half of the time," Sango told him, effectively cutting off Miroku's rejoinder ("How could you say such a thing! I am a monk...") and groping attempt as she crushed his 'wandering' hand.  
Kagome sighed, they were getting off topic again.  
"I dunno, it usually seems to work on everyone but you and Kagome," Shippou informed Sango innocently.  
"That's 'cause they've met him," InuYasha told him, at the same time Sango began her response and Miroku began sputtering protest.  
"Unfortunately. I feel bad for those poor girls, they-"  
"I do not..."  
"Ahem."  
Kagome cut off the argument swiftly and brought their attention back to her. She glared her friends briefly, then tried yet again.  
"One, two, buckle your shoe. Three, four-" another quick glare to keep them quiet- "shut the door, Five, six, pick up sticks-"  
"Finally, something that makes sense," announced the hanyou. Kagome rubbed her temple.  
"Sit!" InuYasha crashed to the ground, and a fierce glare from the now irate girl kept the other three quiet.  
"Seven, eight, lay them straight-" Shippou cut her off, scratching his little head.  
"Lay them straight? You aren't going to use them for a fire?" he asked.  
"Collecting them does seem kind of pointless if you aren't going to use them." agreed Sango.  
"What the hell would you want to make a bunch of sticks straight for, anyway," added InuYasha, getting up and fixing his clothes. Miroku nodded.  
"That does seem pretty futile, Lady Kagome," Miroku told her, in favor of his other companions.  
"It's just a poem, alright? Meant to help Shippou remember his numbers!"  
Kagome tool a deep breath. And tried one. More. Time.  
"Nine, ten, a big, fat - oh forget it."  
Why had she wanted to teach Shippou this poem again?  
  
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One, Two  
By Shel Silverstein  
  
One two, buckle my shoe.  
"Buckle your OWN shoe!"  
Who said that?  
"I did. What are you doing with those silly buckles on you shoes, anyway?"  
Three, four, shut the door.  
"YOU shut it - you OPENED it."  
Er...five, six, pick up sticks.  
"Why should I pick them up - do you think I'm your slave? Buckle my shoe, shut the door, pick up sticks, next thing you'll be telling me to lay them straight."  
But it's only a poem.....Nine, ten, a big fat ... oh never mind. 


End file.
